The Jena 6

Hey, people. I would be remiss if I didn’t weigh in on the Jena 6 situation. I was just listening to Michael Baisden, and could not believe the stuff that I was hearing.

He, along with many of his listeners, plan to march on the courthouse in Jena, Louisiana on September 20 for the sentencing of Mychal Bell. Baisden feels that it is his duty to bring national attention to this matter. He wants to make sure that this story doesn’t just die down and these young men get railroaded. Steve Harvey and a host of other big name celebrities have thrown their name behind it as well.

I am not one to think that just because someone is a celebrity they should get behind something, but this time, that is just what I am advocating. I even think that Oprah should throw her weight behind this. This kind of stuff just cannot be allowed to continue.

For those of you who don’t know, this is a case involving outright prejudice in this day and age. The young men are Robert Bailey (17), Theo Shaw (17), Carwin Jones (18), Bryant Purvis (17), Mychal Bell (17) and an unidentified minor. They are collectively known as The Jena 6. Everything centers on a town in Louisiana where there was still a “white” tree until a couple of months ago.

This is how the story goes:

During an assembly at the high school, a young black male stood up and asked the principal if he could sit under the “whites only” tree, to which the principal replied that he could sit anywhere he wanted. The next day, a couple of black students proceeded to sit under the tree.The response: Three nooses hanging from the tree. Students in question were given an in-school suspension.

The principal dismissed this as a harmless prank. Afterwards, with racial tensions at the boiling point, fights began to break out all over the place. A couple of white kids attacked a black kid at a mostly white party.

Outcome: Nothing. No one arrested. One charged, given probation and told to apologize. (For real!)

The other part of the story involves three young men in a convenience store minding their own business when a white male comes along, an argument begins and escalates. At which point the white male pulls a gun. The black males end up with the gun.

Outcome: White male- nothing. Black males-charged with stealing a fire arm. Yes, this actually happened. No joke!

Next, a couple of black kids attacked a white kid for bragging that he was the one who attacked the black male at the mostly white party.

Outcome: All arrested. 1 convicted. 5 awaiting trial- facing up to 22 years in jail.

A tennis shoe is the lethal weapon that the young men are being charged with using to commit attempted murder. You heard me right- attempted murder- with a tennis shoe.

Another disturbing piece of information I heard while listening to Michael Baisden, came directly from Marcus Jones, the father of 17 year old Mychal Bell, involved a local minister going into the jail and chastising the young man for not accepting a plea bargain. He told him that he had the whole town in an uproar for nothing.

Is that right? Nothing, huh…

The boy’s father said that he was upset about it and rightly so. Who is this minister to tell him that? How did he get in to see the boy without the father or mother’s permission or without approval of the lawyer?

Another incident was phoned in by a reporter who called into the show and spoke about students wearing t-shirts saying “Free the Jena 6″. He also spoke about students wearing “Support the Jena 1″ in reference to the white male who was attacked. According to the caller, the students who were wearing the “Free the Jena 6″ t-shirts were under threat of suspension if they wore them again. However, at no time were the students who wore “Support the Jena 1″ under any such threat.

What is happening to those young men is a travesty. It would be a travesty no matter what race the boys are. It just so happens that they’re black because this type of thing happens to black males most often.

I know I said that I wanted to keep my blog lighthearted, but I broke that rule a long time ago. I had to write about this. It hits home to me because I have three young black men. Anytime something happens involving young black men, I always put myself in the mother’s position. I can’t even imagine what that mom is feeling knowing that her teenage son could face 22 years in prison for what amounts to a school yard fight.

What bothers me about this situation is that this is 2007. This shouldn’t be happening. I am happy that it’s getting national attention. First DWB and other injustices came under scrutiny and into the light. Now this has come to the light. I really do hope that justice is served. I really do.

I am not saying that either sets of boys were right. I’m just saying that the crime ought to fit the punishment. Give them a three day suspension, instead of 22 years in jail.

I’d say that’s a tad bit unfair!!!!!!!!! Don’t ya’ think!

Sale @ Lakeshore!

I just came from Lakeshore. I went in there to look for stuff for my classroom that I don’t have yet. Another part of the special “birthday” treat that I received from B.N.U. is $375 to spend in the classroom.

Needless to say, it was very crowded. Part of the reason is that it’s that time again. Time to go back to school. The other reason could have been to get out of the heat. It’s 102° out here. I know that I’m going to pay for this later (literally), but I am running the A/C all day today.

But, back to the lecture at hand, Lakeshore is having a great sale. A lot of items are 20% off. So, if you have supplies that you need to buy, go to Lakeshore and stock up now.

Here’s the website: www.lakeshorelearning.com

Check it out!

The Day That Henry Cleaned His Room by Sarah Wilson

The Day That Henry Cleaned His Room, written and illustrated by Sarah Wilson, is hilarious. It is the story of Henry who simply, absolutely refuses to clean his room.

The day that he finally did clean it, reporters came. He got up early, although he didn’t understand what everyone was worried about! It had only been a year since he cleaned it. So what if he was the only one who knew the secret path from the door to his bed. It was better that way anyway.

Here’s an excerpt:

The first ones out were Henry’s fish. It had been so long since Henry cleaned their tank that they had grown long legs and climbed out, preferring air to dirty water. They scowled at Henry and walked down the stairs.

Soon, everything is coming out the woodworks, even a flea circus. A possum even rode out wearing Henry’s hawaiian shirt. Henry is getting down to the knitty gritty; he can almost see the floor.
This book is funny. I’d say it’s for 2nd-4th grade. It’s a fun read aloud book as well. I recommend it for moms of any little boy who refuses to clean their room. They should get a real kick out of it. For the girls, there’s a book that I’ll review tomorrow, called Sally’s Room, about a little girl named Sally who refuses to clean her room until it follows her to school one day.

No One Ever Believes Me!

“My family’s thinking, I knew it. She’s not having a hard time.” No one in my family ever believes that I am going through hard times. Well, maybe it’s the $80 haircut; or maybe it’s the $1, 500 brand new laptop that I’m sporting.

I didn’t buy it with my credit cards. That would require available credit on them. Even you may ask, “Well, how did you get all those things without any money?”

Well, I am glad you asked. Now I can tell you!

I really felt like it was my birthday last night, even though my birthday was last month. I feel that way because last night, I got treated to a brand new $1, 500 Mac Book laptop, courtesy of my program @ BNU. Here’s a picture of it, but I will post a picture of me with it later.

As for the $80 do. My husband is making a website for my hairdresser. We’re bartering. She’s doing my hair in exchange for the website. So even though I don’t have a lot of money, I don’t look like a rag mop.

Things are bad right now, but they are on the upswing. I made my plan to take my children school shopping, but I didn’t have to. My mother-in-law took my three sons school shopping, so I only have to buy for Phillise. She’s going to wear uniforms, so that makes my school shopping that much easier.

I like the fact that even though I’m having a hard time, no one believes me. What is it about me and my husband that makes people think that? I don’t know, but I think that it has to do with favor.

Even though I hate to admit it (especially when I’m having hard times), I have favor with people. What I mean by favor is that people give me stuff. I’m never usually lacking. Sometimes just thinking about something that I want badly enough is enough to have someone come up to me, “out of the blue” and tell me where to get it, either for free or very cheaply. That’s why it’s so hard to believe that I have had a hard time all summer. My hard times never last this long. I can’t help but wonder what I’m missing. People keep going through trials for a reason.

“What lesson did I not learn?” I ask myself. Surely, it’s something that I did, or am not doing. I don’t know what it is, but I’m trying to find out because this sista’ girl is tiiiiiiiired of this trial that I’m going through. I am ready to come out. I know that if I can just hold on, my deliverance is at hand.

Well, until next time, people!

Today, She’s My Birthday!

Today, I have something to say about deceivers. They make me soooo mad. They are always trying some scheme or another to defraud someone. Another thing about that that makes me equally as mad is when they succeed.

Did you ever see that “I Love Lucy” episode when they were in Italy. It was little Ricky’s birthday and she missed him so much. One of the kids in the village heard her crying because she couldn’t be there for her baby’s birthday.

To make her feel better, he told her, “Today she’s my birthday.”

Lucy decided to give him something for it. Once he saw that she was giving gifts, little by little, he started bringing other kids from the village to get some too. She was so excited that she just decided to throw a big party for everyone.

Finally the original kid starts feeling bad that he had fooled her when she was only being nice that he decided to make all the kids give back their gifts that Lucy had given them. Well, one little girl did not want to give hers back. She started crying and crying. Finally she explained that today really was her birthday.

Lucy was so happy that she let all the children keep the gifts. Even though they’re little kids, they did get over. Even though they apologized, their original intent was to defraud.

Ya’ know what, the whole time Lucy knew. She just missed her baby so much that she didn’t care. She knew that the kids in the village didn’t have much; she just wanted to bring a little happiness to them. That’s how it is with real life. Sometimes someone may think that they’re pulling one over on someone when they’re not. Be careful of who you’re friends with, you just might learn a lesson.

There are certain people who don’t think so though. Why, oh why do people have to play games? They eventually get what’s coming to them in the end, but they hurt so many people in the process. It makes me so mad! I wrote/said all that to say that life is too short to play games.

That my dear sir or madam is my rant for the day!

A F.A.T. Free Class!

I want a F.A.T. free classroom. Well, what does that mean? It all has to do with special education expert Rick Lavoie (pronounced lavoy).

During my boot camp at B.N.U., I watched a film of one of his workshops that deals with F.A.T. (which I will explain momentarily). In it, he takes the participants through what the Learning Disabled (LD) child goes through. The seminar, held in a small room with a small group, is filled with people from all walks of life: a special education teacher, a school counselor, a behavior specialist, an engineer, a couple of parents and two LD kids. Some of you may already know what F.A.T. stands for, but for those of you who don’t, I will tell you. F.A.T. stands for:

F- fear

A- anxiety

T- tension

These are all the things that a person with a Learning Disability goes through during class.

I want a classroom free of fear, anxiety, and tension. I want the children in my classroom to feel comfortable from day one. I want them to be free to express themselves respectfully. My classroom will be a safe haven.

Mr. Lavoie teaches at a very fast, almost insane, pace. He let the participants experience first hand what the LD child goes through. He say such silly phrases as: “Look harder,” or maybe you’re not trying hard enough, “Try harder”. When he’s saying these things, it puts everything into perspective. Those phrases sound downright silly, because you know what, they are silly. He lets the participants feel for themselves how it feels when everyone is staring at you because you can’t quite get it. He breaks it down even further when he explains what takes an LD child so long to respond to a question.

For example, if an LD child were asked who George Washington was. First they have to decipher the question. Let’s see the teacher said who, so it must be a person. George…George who??? George Washington? Who is that? Meanwhile, the other children have gone on to answer the question leaving the LD child behind in confusion because they have just deciphered the question. They haven’t even thought about the answer.

He also addresses the horrible practice of tearing up a child’s paper which I am ashamed to say that I have done when a child was doing something other than what they were supposed to be doing. I know. I know. That is horrible. I will never, ever, ever, ever do that again. It is so mean, no matter what the reason. Can there ever really be a reason to destroy a child’s property/creation/hard work right in front of them besides trying to humiliate them? Whether they were on task or not, that is simply not an acceptable response.

My classroom will indeed be Fear, Anxiety, and Tension free as possible. This is what, in addition to improved test scores, will make my classroom a success to me. I know how it feels to experience all of these. Hopefully seeing this film will make others more sensitive to what children with LD go through.

I give this film *****/***** stars because of the way that Mr. Lavoie makes it clear exactly what the LD child goes through. This film is a must-see. It is about 2o minutes long. For those of you wanting to see it, here’s the link:

http://www.ricklavoie.com

***P.S.- I looked around on his website, but the only things that I found was ways to purchase the video. I have contacted Mr. Lavoie and am waiting for his answer on how to find it for free. Once I receive the answer, I will post it. In the meantime, check out his website. He’s an excellent educator.***

Hats Off To You, PBS!

***Just a warning. This post is really long. It’s good information, but it’s really long.***

Hats off to you PBS! It seems that you didn’t need to listen my criticisms, but you definitely listened to someone. Perhaps, it was the years of complaints from parents, grandparents and guardians because of the poor quality shows that did not promote early education like they used to years ago. At any rate, the quality is on an upward trend- it’s definitely improving.

First, there’s the upcoming WordWorld, which is an excellent program. I got a chance to preview it with my daughter and was pleasantly surprised.

Now, there is the upcoming SUPER WHY!, which debuts September 3, 2007 also. It, too, is a great show. Here’s a summary directly from the website:

Super Why…to the rescue!
Welcome to SUPER WHY, a breakthrough preschool series designed to help kids ages 3 to 6 with the critical skills that they need to learn to read (and love to read!) as recommended by the National Reading Panel (alphabet skills, word families, spelling, comprehension and vocabulary). SUPER WHY is the first original program from Out of the Blue Enterprises, an innovator in interactive children’s entertainment led by Angela C. Santomero, an Emmy-nominated co-creator of Blue’s Clues, and Samantha Freeman Alpert, a veteran in children’s entertainment. SUPER WHY makes reading an empowering adventure by using interactive literacy games that need YOU to play. In SUPER WHY reading is power!

SUPER WHY is an interactive reading adventure!
We begin each 24-minute reading adventure in Storybrook Village, a magical 3-D world hidden behind the bookshelves in a children’s library. The Storybrook Village is the home of your child’s favorite fairytale characters. Immediately, you’ll meet the four best friends who anchor each episode: Red, from Little Red Riding Hood; Pig from The Three Little Pigs, Princess from The Princess and The Pea, and Whyatt, the curious younger brother of Jack from Jack and The Beanstalk who discovers he has the power to fly inside books to find answers to his questions. Each of these characters is re-imagined as an everyday kid, not unlike your child’s own friends: Red rides roller blades; Pig drives a trike; Princess loves tea parties and dress-up; and Whyatt is the group’s natural leader.

Each episode starts with a preschool relatable problem.
In every episode, one of the friends encounters a problem with another Storybrook Village character (For instance, Jill from the Jack and Jill rhyme is not being nice). As in real life, the problems require preschool social skills to resolve. And that’s when SUPER WHY gets super-powered! Whyatt calls his fairy tale friends to their secret clubhouse, named “The Book Club,” where they transform themselves from mere mortals into literacy-powered super heroes: Alpha Pig with “Alphabet Power,” Wonder Red with “Word Power,” Princess Presto with “Spelling Power,” Super Why with the “Power to Read,” and your child-Super You, with the “Power to Help.” Using their super powers, these Super Readers literally fly inside books. The adventure begins as the Super Readers find out how famous fictional characters handled similar situations (Why is the big bad wolf so big and bad?). This adventure inside a book helps the Super Readers figure out the answers to their own problems. Be prepared to hear: Super Why and the Super Readers.to the rescue!

The Super Readers can solve any obstacle with their literacy powers!
“Inside” each book the Super Readers lead the viewer on an engaging reading adventure. They talk to fictional characters from the story, play reading games and activities to overcome obstacles, search for Super Letters, and practice such key skills as letter identification, word decoding, spelling, vocabulary and comprehension. Super Why, who has the Power to Read can even change a story ending.and save the day! (For example: He can change the big bad wolf to a small good wolf!) What’s unique about this approach is that while kids are learning and practicing the ABC’s of reading, they’re also thinking about what they’re reading, applying reasoning skills to see the story in a real-life context and experiencing books in a powerful new way.

Hip Hip Hurray! The Super Readers save the day!
As soon as the Super Readers solve the fictional problem and gather all the Super Letters they need, they fly back in their Why Flyers to the Book Club. There, they decode the Super Story Answer, or theme, on the Super Duper Computer and reveal how to realistically resolve their own problem. (The big bad wolf is acting bad because he was so sad. He has no friends.) The episode ends with the characters modeling the behavior so kids can actually see the problem being fixed. Finally, with a song you’ll find yourself singing, a dance you’ll quickly pick up, and a hip, hip, hooray! The Super Readers—and Super You—save the day!

	Super Why…with the Power to Read!Whyatt, is a curious and clever 9-year old, who invites viewers into each episode and leads them into making the connection between the real world problem and the book of the day. He also happens to be the younger brother of Jack, of Jack and the Beanstalk. Whyatt’s curiosity and active imagination lead him to constantly ask questions: who, what, where, when, how, and, of course, WHY!Whyatt transforms into Super Why, the ultimate preschool superhero with the “Power to Read!” As the leader of the Super Readers team, he flies into books to find answers to questions. Wearing his signature super hero costume and wielding his powerful Why Writer, Super Why transforms words and sentences to change the story. For example, he might use his Why Writer to zap the words “big” and “bad” to change the Big Bad Wolf into a Small Good Wolf. Super Why also carries his Super Duper Computer, which he uses to collect Super Letters after each game that form the Super Story Answer (the solution to the problem). Putting together all of the reading skills of the Super Readers, Super Why’s “power to read” helps teach literacy concepts, vocabulary, sentence structure, fluency, and word identification. Of course, whenever Super Why demonstrates his powers, he enlists the help of the kids at home every step of the way. With Super Why, kids at home get to experience the sheer power and joy of reading and help save the day!
	Alpha Pig…with Alphabet Power!Pig is a sweet, bashful and slightly timid preschooler. He’s the youngest member of The Three Little Pigs’ family, who (naturally) live in the sturdiest house on the block – right next door to the Big Bad Wolf & family. Pig is always ready to pitch in and help others, although, like many shy kids, he often needs a little encouragement.Pig transforms into the amazing super hero Alpha Pig. Wearing his signature costume and tool belt, and carrying his trusty toolbox, Alpha Pig comes in to the rescue. As a very young reader, Alpha Pig’s focus is on the alphabet, which forms the building blocks of words. He asks the home viewer to help play alphabet games such as singing his version of the ABC song to make letters appear and identifying individual letters. He relies on his Amazing Alphabet tools, including his Mega Magnifying Glass and Lucky Letter Lasso, to help fix a situation. For example, using these alphabet tools, Alpha Pig might fix a sign that tells us which way the Wolf went, lasso letters from a tree to show us the way on our adventure, or build alphabet stairs to climb a beanstalk. Whenever Alpha Pig accomplishes a task he says a celebratory, “Lickety Letters, we did it! Let’s give ourselves a big thumbs up!”
	Princess Presto…with Spelling Power!Quirky and slightly clumsy Princess Pea, the daughter of Prince Charming and Princess Priscilla of The Princess and the Pea, is a princess in training. She carries a pretend wand, travels in a rhinestone-studded coach, and takes dance classes with such royalty as Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty. Although known to be a bit of a “drama queen,” Pea has a good heart and always speaks her mind. And, yes, Princess Pea loves to eat Peas!Princess Pea transforms into the spectacular Princess Presto. Dressed in her beautiful ball gown and sparkling crown, she twirls in, to the rescue! Waving her Magic Spelling wand, she helps kids write letters to spell words and make objects magically appear. For example, Princess Presto might spell “dress” to get Cinderella ready for the ball or spell the word “open” to make a drawbridge open the door to the giant’s castle. She also asks viewers to identify sounds that a letter makes before writing it. Although a bit clumsy at times, Princess Presto has a great sense of humor. And, when it comes to spelling and writing, with the assistance of the home viewer, Princess Presto can help save the day!
	Wonder Red…with Word Power!Red, from Little Red Riding Hood, developed a newfound craving for action and excitement after rescuing her grandmother from that pesky wolf. She’s clever, bold, acrobatic, and energetic – in fact she’s “ready to roll” on any adventure wearing her roller skates. Quick on her feet and with a well-stocked wicker basket in hand, Red is tough to keep up with.Red transforms into Wonder Red. Wearing her super sonic skates, signature superhero swimsuit costume and carrying her Wonder Words Basket, she uses word decoding, rhyming and blending skills to overcome obstacles. When she reads a word that needs changing, she sings her catchy rhyming song to release words from her basket. With the help of the home viewer, she uses word families to solve problems. For example, if the Super Readers are stuck behind a WALL, she might choose the word BALL so she can roll away the obstacle. Wonder Red is daring and adventurous, racing ahead to meet the wolf, climb the beanstalk, or get to the next chapter of our story adventure. With her high-energy style and sassy personality, Wonder Red keeps the story moving forward, while helping kids practice with word families…and off to Grandma’s she goes!
Super You.with the Power to Help!The home viewer transforms into a super hero too — Super You! As Super You, she can jump into classic books and go on reading adventures with the Super Readers. She can actively participate in the game play and use her alphabet, rhyming, spelling or vocabulary skills to overcome story obstacles, meet characters from her favorite stories and create new story endings! Super You also identifies Super Letters across the episode and decodes the Super Story Answer to solve the problem of the day. Reading is power. And Super Why, the Super Readers and Super You have it!Even though all the information is here, there may be more that you will want to see. Here’s the direct link: http://pbskids.org/superwhy/parentsteachers/program/characters.htmlCheck this out. It’s well worth it!

Never Babysit the Hippopotamuses by Doug Johnson

This book, written by Doug Johnson and illustrated by Abby Carter, is extra silly! He also has another book by the name of “Never Ride Your Elephant to School”. This book is somewhere between a book that I reviewed by the name of “The Monster Show” and “If You Give A Mouse a Cookie”. In it, readers are given advice about what to do, or rather what not to do when babysitting the Hippopotamuses.

Readers are instructed not to leapfrog over one because they are hard to jump over; or never to play horsey with them, because they always want you to be the horsey. Don’t forget to turn on the night-light before you leave because Hippopotamuses are afraid of the dark and they will run out of their bedroom and jump into your lap.

So. Never babysit the Hippopotamuses. Unless, of course, your only other choice is to babysit their neighbors, the MONKEYS.

I would recommend this book for 1st-2nd graders who are just getting comfortable with their reading skills. Get this book. It’s good for a couple of laughs.

Stephanie’s Ponytail by Robert Munsch

This is one of the first in a long line of silly books that I will review. This one is called Stephanie’s Ponytail by Robert Munsch, illustrated by Robert Martchenko. Robert Munsch is the author of many books that include: Andrew’s Loose Tooth, David’s Father, Love You Forever, Purple, Green & Yellow, The Paper Bag Princess, Alligator Baby and many others.

This is a cute little book. It’s a story about being yourself and being original. In this story, Stephanie is tired of looking like everyone else, so she asks her mom to do something different.

She says, “Since none of the kids in my class have a ponytail. I want a nice ponytail coming right out the back.” So her mom gives her a nice ponytail coming right out the back. When Stephanie goes to school the other kids look at her and say, “Ugly, ugly, very ugly.”

Stephanie says, “It’s my ponytail and I like it.”

The next day, when Stephanie returns to school, all the other girls, and even the teacher, have ponytails coming out the back. She tells them that they are all a bunch of copycats. The next morning Stephanie tells her mom that she wants a ponytail coming out the side, just above her ear. The same thing happens with everyone copying her hairstyles until Stephanie tricks them. What happens next? Well, I guess you’re going to have to read it and find out. Trust me, you will enjoy it!

Robert Munsch is a great author and Robert Martchenko is a fabulous illustrator. I want to interview Mr. Munsch for my book about reluctant readers. A lot of the children that I worked with, who were reluctant readers, loved his books. The good news is that he does answer letters. I’ve written him and sent him a list of questions and am waiting for his response. He also visits classroom. He even pays his own way.

So if you would like to write him or check out his other books, check him out @ his website RobertMunsch.com

Just A Reminder!

This is just a friendly reminder that the Special Education meeting is tomorrow 8/27/07 @ 10:30 a.m. in the Beaudry Building @ 333 S. Beaudry Bl. (right off of 3rd Street exit, 110 freeway). For more information, here’s a link to my old post.

Mission Impossible: Assignment #2 (Hold On & Believe)

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to hold on and believe that God is there and will pull you through. As usual, I don’t have a choice but to succeed. If I were given the choice of accepting or denying this assignment, I would have turned it down. Well…hold on…I’m not sure…I don’t know if I would have taken it or not because in the past when I have endured an especially hard trial, I have come out smelling like a rose. I learned a lot and was thankful afterwards. During the trial… well that was a different story. During the trial, I did my usual number of whining, bitching and moaning.

But, once I stopped all that silliness, I pulled out my arsenal of weapons- the Bible, friends, gospel songs, etc… Of all the songs that I listen to, there are three that I go to time and time again.They are: “Stand” by Donnie McClurkin. Secondly, “We’ve Come This Far By Faith,” and lastly, “I’m Looking for A Miracle”. These songs speak to me. With the message that all three of these songs send, it makes feel good. It gives me something to hold on to.
Things are pretty bad but I’m not that worried because I Have Come This Far By Faith. I know that God has not brought me this far to leave me. This song helps me feel better because I know that God has never failed me. I would be a fool to believe that he has now. There has been many times in my life where I have felt like I feel now; it was always when my trial was nearing its end.

I am reminded of my post from a couple of days ago when I wrote about reaching for my utility belt. I know that if I could just hold on until the end, that my breakthrough is right there. All I have to do is reach my utility belt- God. He is my utility belt. He has everything that I could possibly need and some other stuff that I may not even know that I need.
When I’m going through a tough time as I am now, my absolute favorite song is “Stand”. After listening to this song, I feel like I have the strength that I need to go on. I feel like I can stand. I feel determined to stand through the storm and through the rain. This song helps me dig deep down into my reserves and get it together enough to make it through the day. Because sometimes, y’all, it can get so bad that you’re living, not from day to day, but from hour to hour, minute to minute.

Whenever I’m looking for a miracle, I get myself ready. If I want new clothes, then I clean out my drawers and make a list of what I need and want. If I want more food, of course, I clean out my fridge and my cabinets. That’s why I’m cleaning out my drawers for new clothes and my fridge and cabinets for an abundant overflow of food. I am looking for my miracle. I know that something good is coming.

I don’t know what gets you through, I just know what gets me through. It’s these songs. They are my salvation. You have to have something that gets you through. If you don’t have something, now is the time to find it. Find that sacred place deep inside you that you can call upon in your time of need. That is what will make all the difference between completing that impossible assignment and making it through vs. failing that impossible assignment and suffering a terrible setback.

You can do it. Just hooooooooold on (Mississippi Mass, “Hold On Old Soldier”) and believe!

You’re Good Enough.You’re Smart Enough & Doggone It, People Like You!

Kinda’ corny, I know! Those words are from Al Franken’s alter ego, Stuart Smalley, from Saturday Night Live.

To lighten the mood when I was blubbering and just being a crying fool, those are the words that my husband used to comfort me. I had myself a good ole’ cry; one of the biggest ones that I’ve had in a long time.

The feelings of unworthiness began earlier in the year when I found out that I didn’t get into Teach for America. I didn’t understand why I didn’t get in. I had the perfect success story. I returned to school after a long absence. After which, I excelled in my program, earning straight “A’s”, except for my bible class which I got a C+ in. At the time that I applied, I had a cumulative g.p.a. of 3.6; yet I didn’t make the cut. The one thing that I don’t like about Teach for America is that they don’t respond. They don’t let you know the reason why you didn’t make the cut.

Well, after so many months of feeling unworthy, I finally found out why I didn’t make the cut. I didn’t make the cut because of a simple misunderstanding. (I have to go back and change my older post regarding AmeriCorps. ) I don’t understand how I could have been so wrong! I thought that I could do T.E.A.M.S and Teach for America for two years each for a total of four times. That is incorrect. The total amount is two times.

This is what it breaks down to: If I would not have chosen my current AmeriCorps program, I could have been in Teach for America (TFA). I couldn’t get in because I was already in one AmeriCorps program, which used up half my time that I could participate in AmeriCorps programs. Since a two year commitment is required for Teach for America, I could not have joined.

If I would have known that, I would not have chosen T.E.A.M.S. Don’t get me wrong, T.E.A.M.S is a good program, it’s just that Teach for America offers a little more. They offer a 40% discount on tuition at certain universities; they find you a teaching job and a lot more.

Anyway, I was crying because for my boot camp, there were a couple of TFA people there. I was a little intimidated for a bit because they got in and I didn’t. I was also crying because since I did make the choices that I did, I am not going to be receiving that 40% tuition discount. I have to find my own teaching job… blah, blah, blah. I was basically holding my own pity party. I didn’t need anyone else in attendance- just three people- me, myself, and I. After a little while, I began to say, “Hey, we’re all in this room together, regardless of what program we’re in or not in”.

However, I still felt bad because in one fell swoop, I realized that I will not be getting the $18,900 from AmeriCorps like I thought it was. It is going to be somewhere in the neighborhood of $9,000. (It would have been more, but it was prorated because I didn’t have all the hours that I needed.) Not only that, but I don’t qualify for the Teacher Forgiveness Loan (TFL) because I’ve received AmeriCorps $$.

What upsets me the most is the fact that I thought that I had done all the research necessary. I read and I read and I read. Yet somehow, I didn’t get an understanding. I misunderstood. How did that happen? How could I have been so wrong? I feel like I’m damned if do and damned if I don’t. But, so I wouldn’t dehydrate myself, I stopped crying, because at this point there’s nothing that I can do about it.

Because I misunderstood, the thing that I was most afraid of happening, is happening. Barring a miracle, I am going to come out of school owing about $45,000 in student loans. Let me see… let’s do the math. It’s not as bad as it sounds though because,-$9,000 for AmeriCorps, and -$19,000 for the A.P.L.E. grant, and -$6000 (@ $3,000/yr. for the next two years) for the L.A.U.S.D. scholarship, that brings the total to about $-$34,000 once everything is said and done. That’s only about $11,000 and some change. Which, when you think about it, is excellent for education at not one, but two private universities.

Now that everything is put into perspective, it’s definitely worth it. I was just being a big fat cheapskate. Well, actually, I thought that it was more until I did the math just now. So now I don’t feel so bad. I’m actually feeling better. I don’t have to begin paying back until the end of 2009. Not bad. Not bad.

There’s a price to pay for everything— $11,000 for two universities is an excellent price to pay for the priceless gift of an education which is an investment in myself.

Now that I know that I could have made it into TFA, I don’t feel so bad because I know that I am good enough, I am smart enough, and doggone, people like me!

Finally Registered!

Okay, I finally registered for my classes. I was a little frustrated earlier because I couldn’t. I had to figure out the system and a bunch of other stuff but I finally did thanks to the many helpful people there. I am on my way. Thank you Jesus and Hallelujah!

Classroom Ideas

This is something that I came up with when I was sitting down watching t.v.

I’m going to call it the Juice board- as in, get your juices-creative juices flowing.

I decided based on my own tastes. I like apple juice the least (unless it’s Martinelli’s), followed by orange juice, with grape juice and strawberry-banana being the best. This is based on the scoring rubric on a scale of 1-4, with 4 being the best. It may need a little refining, but this is a starting point. If there is anyone out there who can offer anything else, let me know. At any rate, here it is:

Apple-1

Orange-2

Grape-3

Strawberry Banana- 4

Thursday’s Thirteen

I have been so busy with school that I forgot to post Thursday’s thirteen for today. But, like a true trooper, I came home after going to school today and wrote it. Here it is, thirteen things that I’m grateful for:

1. My four beautiful, healthy children.
2. Being in my right mind.
3. Being married.
4. Pursuing my dream of becoming a special ed. teacher.
5. Being at a great school to make that dream a reality.
6. The determination to keep going.
7. Having a great husband.
8. Even though they get on my nerves, having a family that’s supportive when it counts.
9. Strength in the midst of the storm.
10. Having tenacity, determination and everything else that makes me who I am.
11. Being healthy.
12. Freedom to express myself.
13. Having a nice home to live in.

I Love My Hair by Natasha Anastasia Tarpley

I like this book. It reminds me of when I was little and my mother used to braid my hair. It also reminds me of  braiding my own daughter, Phillise’s, hair. Initially I read this book to her to get her to let me comb her hair. After that I read it to her so that she could love her hair. When she started going to school and seeing the different types of hair & hair lengths of her friends’, she began to worry that her hair looked different; that it looked too short. She wanted long hair like her Barbie dolls and her friends.

When I found this book, I thought that it was perfect because it addresses the issue of kinkiness and tangles. When she saw the little girl in the book with the braids and beads, she was amazed.

I love that the little girl in the story is cocoa colored like Phillise. She is so happy whenever she sees someone who looks like her in a book. That’s why this book is so perfect. Not only is the little girl the same color, but her hair looks the same.

I would recommend this book to mothers, grandmothers, aunts, etc. of little girls, whether they have kinky hair, fine hair, soft hair or whether they fall somewhere in between with hair like my daughter’s.This book is such a godsend. Run out and get it for a little girl that you know who may be struggling with liking her kinky hair, or who may just need to see herself in a book. If you used to get your hair braided it will take you back!

Where Would I Be Right Now?

In an older post, I talked about blowing my chance when I was younger. I had a free ride and I blew it. So it’s only natural that sometimes I ask myself where I would be right now if I hadn’t blown my chance. I don’t know what the answer is. That’s something I’ll never know because I didn’t choose that path. It gives me comfort to think that I chose the right one for better or for worse…
It’s called a strategic inflection point- a fork in the road. (Yeah, yeah. I know, I know. The picture is extra cheesy). It’s when there’s an important, life changing decision to be made. You can either choose point A or you can choose point B.

Point A could take you to higher heights and deeper depths and land you where you want to be; while point B could take you to the slums of…

The one that seems like the right one could be the wrong one, while the one that seems like the wrong one could be the right one.The question is which one should you take?

I don’t know. After all this time, I still don’t know how to answer that. It all depends on which one resonates with your heart. When I decided to have my first son @ the age of 19, I knew that I was taking the harder road. When I had my second one three days before my 21st birthday, I knew that it would be even harder; but that is the one that I took.

Did any of that stop me? Nope, sure didn’t. I got sidetracked for a couple of years, but I always knew that somehow I would do it. Now, four children and 18 years later, my life has turned out better than I expected it to. My husband and I were still able to buy a house @ 29 years old with no help from anyone. My children are well adjusted individuals with good heads on their shoulders. My oldest son is on his way to University, while my others are in 11th, 5th and kindergarten.

I’d say that that’s not bad for someone who everyone counted out because I had two children @ 21. I never stopped believing. I believe that is what made the difference in me being successful and someone else not.

So, it doesn’t matter where I would have been. What matters is where I am now. I am very pleased with where I am now. I hope you are also. If not, ask yourself: Are you happy with yourself where you are right now? Why not? What can you do to make it better?

Start right now to make a change because it only takes one step. Remember- the journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.

Mission Impossible: Assignment #1 (School shopping on a budget)

**Just a warning, this post is kinda’ long **

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to raise good, well mannered, ambitious children in this world. Of course I accept it. What am I talking about, I have no choice but to accept it. The moment that I had my first child, almost 18 years ago, I knew what my mission was. Having children is only the beginning of the mission. There have been many missions since then and there will be many more. As always, failure is not an option. I must continue.

Mission Impossible #1: Go school shopping for three children(an 11th grader, a 5th grader & a kindergarten) for less than $500. Oh boy! How, oh how, am I going to accomplish that?

Okay Leila, put your thinking cap on. Let’s see, Big 5 has so many shoes @ such great prices. Fallas Paredes, the uniform store, has great prices on uniforms and accessories. But can it be done? Yes, it can and has been done.

Let’s see: The first person to buy for is Dakota. Since he’s in his junior year of high school, his clothes are important, so he gets first priority. He already has 4 pairs of jeans that I will put in the cleaners, so that’s less that I have to buy. I have to do a little bit more for him. JC Penney has a really good back to school sale every year. I mean really good.

Last year I got him five pairs of South Pole jeans for $100 + tax. I also got him South Pole t-shirts which were on sale for $9.99 ea. So I can get him five pairs of jeans w/10 shirts @ JCPenney’s for a grand total of about $200 + tax. For his shoes, Big 5 has And 1 ($29.99 + tax) and U.S. Polo ($16.99 + tax) tennis shoes. Getting two pairs of shoes for a teenage boy who just happens to wear a size 13 shoe for under $50 is almost unheard of.

The next person is Phillise. She’s only five, but she’s a girl. I have to tread very carefully with her because she already likes to shop. I am going to have to explain to her that she needs to wear uniforms and not regular clothes, so that she won’t cry. Little girls!

Her uniform calls for a burgundy & gray plaid jumper with a burgundy or white shirt. While I’m @ Fallas Paredes I will get her one jumper for $9.99, one pair of burgundy shorts for $5.99 and five white shirts @ $3.99 each. I can get David a pair of skate shoes ($19.99 + tax). He wears blue pants & a white shirt for his uniform @ school. I will go to Fallas Paredes and get two pairs of navy pants @ $9.99 + five shirts @ $3.99 ea. That will last him well into next month. I will just have to do a lot of washing.

Just in case you haven’t been keeping count, let me sum it up:

For Dakota, the total will be about $300.00 for 5 pairs of jeans, 10 t-shirts, 2 pairs of shoes + $20 for socks and underwear.

For David, the total will be about $80.00 for 2 pairs of pants, 5 uniform shirts, 1 pair of skate shoes @ Big 5 + $20 for socks and underwear.

For Phillise, the total will be about $80 for 1 jumper, 1 pair of shorts, 5 uniform shorts, 1 pair of shoes + $20 for socks and underwear.

That brings the grand total to about $500, once taxes are added, for 3 children. Shopping on a budget may take a bit of creativity, but it can be done.

** If your shopping budget is limited, do your wallet a favor and check out Big 5 for shoes and Fallas Paredes for uniforms & stuff.**

Congratulations Are In Order!

I passed!I passed!I passed!I passed!I passed!I passed!I passed!I passed! What am I trying to say? Yes, I have officially passed all three parts of the C.S.E.T. I am sooooooo happy! Yay me! Once I get my official transcripts from Azusa, I can start going on interviews for L.A.U.S.D.

Studying does indeed pay off!

Now…Back To Reality!

Hey, here’s something you may not have expected: me to write about something involving special education. I know, I know…who would have thought that a website that’s supposed to be about special education would actually write something about special education…but yep, I finally have something to say about it. It’s been a long summer y’all and things are coming to an end. I have to go school shopping for my children, I have to go on job interviews for L.A.U.S.D., I’m starting back to school, etc…

There are so many things that I want to talk about so let me number them.

1. Going back to school after a 4 month break.
2. Finding a job.
3. Not feeling like I’m good enough at first.
4. Going school shopping on a budget (more later).

Well, the time has come, the time is now, so Marvin K. Mooney (me) is going now. I’m pretty sure that I mentioned that I’m starting work on my mild/moderate Special Education credentials, but just in case I didn’t, there it is!

School officially starts back for me on Wednesday, August 29th. This week, I have to go for a 20 hour pre-service boot camp. I am so happy, excited and honored to be going to Big Name University (BNU). I have a fabulous advisor who I get along great with. The program sounds wonderful. My advisor is going to be there every step of the way. She will go to my first I.E.P. meeting with me, help me with assessments, and be on campus with me at least six times a year. I am so pleased!

This leads me to my next thought about finding a job. It’s all dependent on passing the C.S.E.T. for which I will get the results today. Keep your fingers crossed! But whether I do or not, my advisor told me about another avenue that I could pursue- it’s called a Provisional Pre-intern contract. This is for those who have trouble passing the standardized tests.

Here’s the link: http://www.teachinla.com/contracts/glossary.html#ppic

This leads me directly into my thought about not feeling good enough. Before I was admitted, I was wondering about how I was going to feel. I began to feel like I’m not good enough. Do I have what it takes to make it @ BNU?

Yes. Yes I do. I have always had it. I felt this same way when I first started at Azusa where I was definitely out of my element. Even though BNU is a bigger and better known university, I don’t feel like I did @ Azusa. I was feeling that way initially, but I ‘m not now. Thank God that I got over that!

On to my next point. Snap back to reality! No more lazing around the house on vacation. I am returning to school and so are my children. That means school shopping when there is barely any money in the budget. Look out for my post on Mission Impossible: School shopping on a budget! tomorrow.

This post was kinda’ long so I’ll end it here. Until next time people, hasta la bye-bye!

If You Don’t Know…

If you don’t know what the #$%& you’re talking about, then don’t say anything. I don’t like it when people who are in charge of something don’t really know what’s going on. This is one of my pet peeves. I know that it happens, but how can you be in charge and not really know what’s really going on? Or worse yet, give out misinformation?
I am so glad that I thoroughly research whatever I’m interested in, or else I would be up the creek without a paddle. What am I talking about you ask?I am talking about someone that I spoke with recently regarding my application for L.A.U.S.D.

Except for my C.S.E.T. results that I get tomorrow, I have everything that I need to become hired as a University intern for L.A.U.S.D. I know because I have done extensive research. Well, why then did I get a different answer when I spoke with this person in question. She told me that I had to be in my credentialing program for at least a year (not true). She only told me negative stuff; what I couldn’t do. Okay, it’s fine to tell me the realistic aspects of what I can’t do, but THEN counter that with what I can do; with what I need to do to help me reach my goal.

Never once did she try to offer up any type of solution to me or give me other alternatives. When I tried to ask her more questions, she didn’t entertain them. She was pretty dismissive. This pisses me off. Had I been anyone else, I probably would have been discouraged. Since I didn’t get the answer that I wanted, I simply called back.

After speaking with my advisor a couple of days ago, she told me that even if everything didn’t go well regarding the C.S.E.T. , then I could ask for a provisional University intern contract. This is basically an emergency credential. I just wish that the person @ L.A.U.S.D. would have told me that. But you know what, I am very resourceful. I always find out what I need to know. I make it a habit of asking, asking and asking some more until I find an answer that’s satisfactory to me. I’m glad that I have a fantastic advisor.

This is for all those out there who don’t know their job. If you don’t know what you’re talking about, find out the answer(s) from someone higher up or maybe even an underling who knows the real answer.

That my dear sir or madam is my rant for the day!

“Girl, Are You Crazy?”

Yesterday I wrote about keeping your head up and having courage. Today I’m writing about depression because I have had many bouts with depression in my life. I am ashamed to say that I let what others thought about me taking medication hinder my decision to get help. I am also writing because there is such a stigma in the black community about seeking help for depression. The attitude is like:

“Girl, you don’t need no psychologist or psychiatrist. You just betta’ get yo’self over there and talk to one of your sisters or your mother or somebody. You alright.”

Let’s not even talk about wanting to get medication:

“Medication?”

“Girl, are you crazy?”

No, not crazy, just depressed!

Although many don’t think so, depression is a real illness. It is nothing to be ashamed of. If you need help, don’t let anyone talk you out of it. They may mean well, but the only person the decision as to whether you’re ok or not is your doctor.

Here are some links to help anyone who may be dealing with depression.

www.righttotheheart.com

www.depressionisreal.org

www.depression.com

www.novartisclinicaltrials.com

Remember: “If you need help, get help.”

Baby Keep Your Head Up!

There are a couple things in this life that can sidetrack and take the life right outta’ you. One of the most devastating-the opposite of courage- is discouragement.

Let’s really analyze the word.

Dis-1 : opposite or absence of 2 : not

courage- mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty

ment- 1 : action : process 2 : state or condition resulting from a (specified) action

Put it all together and you have: not having the mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty as a result of state or condition resulting from a specified action.

Mouthful? Yes it is because it is a serious situation. Add to that a lack of hope and this can lead to depression, of which there are two types: acute and chronic (more later).

Well, in the immortal words of Tupac Shakur, “Baby, keep your head up.” You have to keep your head up because there are so many things in this world that can test us and try to break us. You can do it. Don’t get discouraged.
Ya’ gotta have courage.

Courage will give you the ability, tenacity, and wherewithal to continue in the midst of the storm; when you don’t feel like going on; when you feel like you can’t go on. Courage allows you to reach down deep and do what needs to be done. Courage will help you deal with depression and other stuff that comes your way.

So, until your deliverance comes, baby, do keep your head up!

Thirteen Things I Dislike About Myself

This is my Thursday’s thirteen. This is thirteen things that I dislike about myself.

1. When upset, I can become extremely cold.
2. Sometimes I will just look at someone and take an instant dislike to them. Even though I’m usually right, I feel like I’m judging people too harshly.
3. If I don’t have a goal to work towards, I can be extremely unmotivated.
4. I am inconsistent.
5. Sometimes I gossip too much.
6. Sometimes I give up on people.
7. I have a hard time forgiving.
8. I am stubborn.
9. I’m not saying that I am, but I have been accused of being too sensitive. What, you think so too? What you tryna’ say?
10. I have a hard time accepting criticism.
11. I AM a drama queen.
12. I have had this weight on me for 5 years.
13. I talk too much.

Attention: Upcoming Informational Meeting For Special Education Teachers

Special Education Initiative: An informational meeting will be held at 10:30 a.m. on Monday, August 27th for those considering a career in the field of Special Education @ 333 S. Beaudry Ave., Los Angeles, CA 90017. Topics will include the employment process, special education credentialing opportunities, as well as teaching special education in the District. Individuals with related experiences and a strong desire to make a difference in the lives of special education students are invited to register for the meeting by contacting Doreen Mendoza at doreen.mendoza@lausd.net or Sherry Uribe at sherry.uribe@lausd.net.

The District Intern Program also holds monthly Information Meetings during the school year at the Board room, L.A.U.S.D. Headquarters. They will begin in September.

For more information, visit the L.A.U.S.D. website @ www.teachinla.com .

A Peek Into The Mind Of A Crazed Post-A-Holic!

I was reading this author’s website with interviews from authors who have had books published this year and they were discussing their writing process. I was inspired by that to write about my writing muse and my writing process. I read the article because I wanted a peek inside their heads. How would you like a peek inside the head of a crazed post-a-holic?

This is me. It could very well be my self portrait if it weren’t a man. I feel like writing is in me. It is what I do. It is who I am.

Let me just start by saying that everything inspires me. Everything is a potential post. Since I don’t have to limit myself, every thing’s fair game.

If I had my way, I would write all day long about whatever popped into my mind. I literally have to stop myself and redirect my mind to something else so that I won’t write. I like to post more than once a day. Nay, I say..I have to post more than once a day. Posting less seems like I’m slacking. When I do something I go all the way. No half-stepping here. That’s why I have somewhere in the neighborhood of 160 posts in only 3 months time. I am the only contributor here, so I’d say that that’s a lot. I’d say I was definitely a post-a-holic.

Thank you Mr. Falker, by Patricia Polacco

This book, written by one of my favorite authors, Patricia Polacco. She is a great writer who has overcome tremendous personal obstacles. I am personally a big fan of hers. This book details her own experience with dyslexia. It chronicles her story of falling behind and feeling worthless until one teacher takes the time to get her tested. Not much was known about dyslexia back then but thank God that she was still able to get the help that she needed from a wonderful caring teacher.

I was encouraged by this book since it’s a tribute to a great teacher. This is especially touching to me because is shows how one person can make a difference in the life of a child. I wonder what would have happened if Mr. Falker wasn’t there? Where would Patricia Polacco be? Would we even know her name? This really makes me anxious to get started teaching so that I can be one of the teachers that make a difference.

This book is so beautiful. Pay special attention when you come to this part of the book→ when you’re reading it. It shows her grandfather putting honey on the book. I didn’t understand where this was going until he told her to taste it. This was to instill in her the love of reading; to let her know that the words and the knowledge contained in the pages of a book are as sweet as honey.

I would highly recommend this book to parents with children who have learning disabilities. The story is especially touching and personal since it is her first hand account of what happens when a child has a learning disability and consequently is teased because they can’t keep up.

She has so many great books. There is another one of her books that I  review later, Pink and Say, that is so beautiful as well. It will bring tears to your eyes. Phillise is a big fan of one of her other books, Emma Kate, about a little girl and her imaginary friend who just happens to be an elephant.

This book gets *****/***** because it is a brutally honest, well written book with great illustrations that tells a story that needs to be told. Do yourself a favor, go out and get this book for a child that you know who has a disability so that they can see themselves. Everyone needs to see themselves or someone like them in a book. Also get this book for any child to teach them about children who have learning disabilities so that they will know about the disabilities and respect them.

I would also definitely recommend this for teachers. This book will make a great addition to any classroom library or personal library. Pick it up if you don’t already have it.

Here is a link about the story in her own words @ patriciapolacco.com.

**For teachers**–If 5 or more students from a classroom write to her, she promises that she will send a letter within 5-7 days that can be copied for the whole class.

Check it out!

If.. I.. Could.. Just.. Reach.. My.. Utility Belt!

Why does it is seem so easy to do wrong and so hard to do right? Recently I heard about someone that I know of with a felonious past who was really trying hard, but he “allegedly” fell; he went back to to the “big house“. Right now the evidence is only circumstantial, so I’m hoping that he’s innocent because he has been so faithful for about three years now. Whenever the church doors are opened, he is there. He drives the church bus. He participates in Sunday school. He is there for everything. Then stuff started happening to him out of the blue. He lost his wallet and didn’t have the money to replace the stuff in there. He fell on hard times. The list goes on.

He was really trying, but I guess that the temptation to go back to his old lifestyle was probably just too much for him to resist.

The straight and narrow… isn’t for everyone. Everyone can want to do it, but everyone will not have the tenacity and the determination to stay on that path.

I know that if he could have held on just a little longer, his breakthrough was right there. But, obviously, he couldn’t. Maybe he didn’t want to, maybe he just didn’t have it in him.

So Abandoned & Alone

I can remember coming home from school in 12th grade to find the house all boarded up. I went to the front door and saw that it was boarded up. I went to the side and it was boarded up. I went to the back door and it was boarded up.

When I saw the pale yellow colored paper on the front door, things became clear.

We lost our home! We’d been evicted!

After realizing what happened, embarrassment set it. I quickly went around to the back of the house and sat dejectedly on the back step not wanting any of my friends to see me. I was hot, thirsty, hungry and confused.

I had so many questions like: What’s going on? Where’s my mother? Why hadn’t she taken care of things? Where was I going to sleep? How would I get to my clothes? my shoes? my bed? Everything was in the house. Since it was a pretty warm day, I didn’t leave the house with a jacket, so I didn’t even have a jacket. I had nothing.

Randomosity!

There are so many things rattling around in my brain that I have to get out. I have had to contain myself all summer from posting multiple times a day as I am a recovering post-a-holic. Seriously it is really hard for me. I just started this blog on May 11, 2007, and I already have more than 150 posts written before this. I have enough post saved up and scheduled to post for the next week and a half. I love writing. I can’t stop it even if I wanted to. The ideas just come to me.

I just had to write about life and the randomosity (I know that it’s not a real word) of it all. Up one day; down the next. I hate it. This thing we call life-this rollercoaster- is so confusing. I am in such turmoil. I am in the midst of a personal crisis. I am having trouble believing things that I used to believe. Life is funny like that. Ya’ know. You wake up one day and everything is different. What happened? What changed my way of thinking? Why did I stop believing? I don’t know why, but I have. I would like to go back….well, not go back, but just feel the way that I used to feel when I really believed in something.

Self-Publishing Website

For the book that I’m writing on reluctant readers, I am going to self-publish it. I’ve checked out a couple of self-publishing firms and was appalled at what they were charging. Well, I hit pay dirt on one of my searches- this site called lulu.com. It is an on demand publishing site, so you aren’t charged the outrageous fees. You pay for the books that are published. No more; no less. There’s no setup fee or other nonsense miscellaneous fees. If you are looking to go the route of self-publishing, check this out. You just might like what you find.

Check it out @ www.lulu.com!

I’ve Been Tagged!

I’ve been tagged by Mom loves being at home.

Here are the rules:

1. You have to post these rules before you give the facts.
2. Players, you must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of their middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.
3. When you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post containing your own middle name game facts.
4. At the end of your blog-post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag.
5. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog

My middle name is Leila

Laugh- I love to laugh. Thank God that I have a funny husband because I am the biggest goofball. I laugh at everything,

Excited- Once I feel good about something, there is no stopping me. I get so excited about it.

Introvert – This surprises most people that I am an introvert because I am very talkative and I don’t hesitate to speak up in public situations. But I am very much the introvert. I can’t handle too much time with people. I am very comfortable giving large parties at my house of 50 + people, but if I were to go to a party with 50 + people, I would be so uncomfortable.

Left-handed- No, I am not left-handed and I know that this is weird. I love to see left-handed people write. It is so fascinating to me. I remember this one girl from high school used to write upside down. I would look at her write and wonder how she did that.

Athletic – I am not athletic. I have never been athletic. I never will be athletic

There. All finished. Now I’m going to tag The Fashionista & Starting Today.

Exercise Update

I have lost about 5 pounds so far. I don’t know how many inches, but I can definitely see a difference. I have to decided to ramp up my exercise routine with Taebo. That will make almost 2 hours of exercise a day. At that rate, I may reach my goal sooner than expected. Wish me luck!

Thirteen Things I’m Good At

1. Opening cellophane quietly. My children used to beg for everything. I had to learn how, or I wouldn’t have been able to eat anything by myself.
2. Being a drama queen (self-explanatory).
3. Writing.
4. Reading.
5. Watching t.v.
6. Reading between the lines.
7. Getting mad at my husband (I think that I’m approaching legendary status. Over the years, I have become quite the expert).
8. Throwing a tantrum (Nuff said).
9. Eating potatoes (Hence the thunder thighs which I am working on getting rid of).
10. Being emotional!
11. Shopping (I can make a dollar holler).
12. Vegging out (When I’m tired don’t bother me)!
13. Being me!

Mommy, I’m Writing A Post!

I was writing a post when Phillise went to get her Barbie laptop and informed me that she was going to write a post also. Of course she can’t type, especially not a post. The laptop isn’t real, but it’s so cute that she thinks that she can and she is going to try whether she knows how or not. Isn’t that the cutest thing? I must be doing something right. My baby wants to be like her mommy. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Did PBS Hear Me?

Some of you may remember my post, entitled “Shame on you PBS,”where I blasted PBS for airing shows like Teletubbies, Boohbah & Barney. Well, it seems as if they heard me. (I know that they really didn’t). They have come out with a new show called “Word World.”

I wrote about an opportunity to preview it in another post entitled, “More reading lists,” in which I linked to another site, Momcentral.com. Well, this is that show.

I signed up back then and got the DVD the other day. It had been a while, so I had almost forgotten what it was. Phillise & I watched it. We were pleasantly pleased. I am so proud of PBS for going back to their old ways. Is there a new program director at PBS? I hope so. I also hope that this is the first of many great shows to come.

The characters in the show, Dog, Bear, Cat, Pig, Sheep, Duck, Ant & Frog are wonderful. They are made up of the letters in their name. Words are the stars of the show. They come alive. There is one such instance where kangaroo delivers a box. When she takes the b o x out of her pouch and sets it down, the letters turn into a box. I love this show. I am really looking forward to watching it with Phillise. I highly recommend this show.

It gets *****/***** stars.

Thank you PBS for bringing out a quality show!

Check it out at wordworld.com

How’s That For A Nice Dose Of Irony?

I entered this poetry contest @ poetry.com. I decided that nothing but the best would do, so I submitted what I considered my best poem. I put so much work into it. It was about words. I built it up from a phoneme to telling how they cut like knives. Well, what do you think happened? Yep, they rejected it. They then told me that I had a limited amount of time to submit another one if I wanted to be considered for the grand prize. Well, I made up one on the spot. It took me all of five minutes.

Guess what happened with that?

It got submitted for the semi-finals. How’s that for a nice dose of irony? Here’s the poem in question:

Miss me, kiss me, love me

Hey, I’m just me.

Just lil’ ole’ me.

I’d like to be you,

sitting down as if right on cue.

Being rude to folk. It’s a joke;

a private one,

won off the backs of others,

that’s only understood by some,

But that I can’t do.

It’s ridiculous to think,

red, green, blue or pink,

would fit me.

That’s not she, this one known as me.

Just to get things straight, I don’t hate

the one known as you, the one who,

would sell her soul

for just a lump of coal.

Just like a naughty child,

let wild.

Stop yourself. Dismiss yourself.

Miss me,

kiss me,

love me.

Just don’t try to change this one.

‘Cause if you do, you miss half the fun.

© clb

It’s not my best work, yet the publishers chose this for the finals. Go figure!

Touching Spirt Bear by Ben Mikaelsen

I read this great book by Ben Mikaelsen, Touching Spirit Bear. Total Transformation recommended it for David, but I realized that it was too much for him, so since I checked it out from the library, I read it. I was very impressed by this book. So much so that I am going to buy it to have in my personal library.

This book is recommended for ages 10 and up. I would agree with that. I am returning it to the library, but when I purchase it, I am going to give it to my older sons to read.

I really didn’t intend for this particular post to be a book review when I started writing. I only intended for it to be about a particular portion in the book that I felt was so profound.

Well, here it is anyway-the title character in the book, Cole Matthews, is very angry and has had a lot of run ins with the law in his short life. His parents always manage to pay someone off and get him out of his mess. That time is over.

After he brags about robbing a convenience store and is caught as a result of a classmate, Peter, telling on him, he goes crazy. He ends up causing Peter brain damage. The courts say no more. He is finally faced with real jail time. He still doesn’t see that it’s his fault. He blames everyone but himself: his abusive father, his alcoholic mother, even Peter.

Happy Birthday Phillip!

My husband playfully calls me his “old lady.” This is funny because there is only 9 days difference between us. I told him that he must be old too because as of today he is 37 also. So happy birthday to my companion/husband/lover/confidante of 19 years. We have officially been together for more than half our lives.

Happy 37th birthday baby! Here’s to many more!

Keep On The SUNny Side!

Aaah, sunrise! My favorite time of day. Everything is so fresh and undisturbed. There’s not as much noise. There are less cars driving by; everything is so still. The day is filled with such great possibilities. Whenever I’ve been through hard times, I have been up at the crack of dawn watching the sun rise. Consequently, whenever I am going through one of the best times in my life, I am up at the crack of dawn to watch the sun rise.

It’s funny how some things never change.The sun has always been a source of such great contradiction to me. I don’t know if that’s the right word, but I can’t think of the right word that I want to say right now.

Roxaboxen by Alice McLerran

I know that this picture is big, but bear with me. It had to be large to show the detail. Just look at the book and use your imagination. Are those sticks or are they horses used to gallop around as they fight to slay the mighty dragon? Those are some of the questions that you might have asked yourself if you were a resident of Roxaboxen.

Roxaboxen was a magical land made up of sticks, stones, glass & discarded boxes that were magically transformed by its inhabitants who had something that money couldn’t buy- imagination. This book is a tribute to imagination.

The Tortoise & The Hare

Slow and steady wins the race!

photo credit

When I first started going to the gym, I felt alone and more than a little intimidated by the women who were already in shape and who seemed to know just what exercises to do. I felt so awkward because I didn’t know how to use the machines while they seemed to be experts. I was trying to figure out how to use the elliptical and feeling rather silly that I didn’t know how when the woman next to me politely leaned over and told me how to get it started.

After that, I didn’t feel so silly anymore. I also didn’t feel so alone either. I slowly started feeling more comfortable, but there was still the feeling of being too slow and behind. Everyone seemed to be going faster and longer than me on the machine. Some women would come in and just ramp it up. I would look at them in awe until I noticed something; they could only do about 5-10 minutes at that fast pace, while I could do 15-20 minutes at my slow and steady pace. It reminded me of the tortoise and the hare.

Just then it reminded that everything has a beginning. Maybe the women who look fabulous now didn’t look so fabulous when they were beginning. Maybe they even felt awkward like me. Maybe everyone didn’t feel as awkward as I did, but they felt something. It’s not always easy to go into someplace new; especially a gym. If you’re outta’ shape, it feels like everyone looking at you. If you’re in great shape, it feels like everyone is envious. (Women can be like that sometime.)

I know that my weight is not going to come off overnight, because it didn’t get there overnight. As far as me and my exercise regimen are concerned, I will stick to slow and steady, because it is a tried and true method. Slow and steady does indeed win the race.

Thirteen Things I Want For My Children

Here’s my Thursday’s thirteen.

This is thirteen things that I want for my children, in no particular order:

1. Success. Their measure of success, not mine.
2. Happiness. Again, their measure, not mine.
3. Love for life.
4. Peace. This includes peace of mind, a piece of the American pie, etc…
5. Joy.
6. A spouse that they love beyond measure who also loves them just as much.
7. Money, but not too much. Enough to be comfortable, but not enough to be cocky about.
8. Humility. (Enough said.)
9. As many children as they want with the means to take care of them.
10. Education, whether it’s college, or life experience.
11. Someone to be silly with.
12. Someone who they can be themselves with.
13. And finally, knowledge of who they are.

Good Summer Eatin’ On A Budget, part 2

Just a little warning- this post is kinda’ long.

The best way to stretch your budget during the summer months is to think creatively. Ask yourself what your children like to eat. Are they picky eaters or little eat-’em-ups? If they are like my children who eat anything, then stretching your budget should not be a problem. However, if you have picky eaters, it gets a little harder. It’s all about knowing your child and what they will or will not eat.

My teenage sons have very healthy appetites and they also love healthy foods. So, needless to say, they love to eat. Sometimes there is a gap between dinner and lunch. This is what I do, I make them a vegetable platter for only $4. At the .99¢ store you can buy cucumbers in packs of 3, a pack of carrots, a pack of cherry tomatoes & a pack of celery. This will make a vegetable platter for all four kids. Just put some ranch dressing on the side for dipping and you’ve bought yourself at least an hour.

Here’s a menu for a week for a family of six for less than $100.00.

I Like Myself by Karen Beaumont

I like myself, I’m glad I’m me. There’s no one else I’d rather be.

These are words from Karen Beaumont’s book, I Like Myself, illustrated by David Catrow. I love his work. What I love even more is the fact that the little girl in the book is brown like me and Phillise. When I was younger, I didn’t see a lot of characters that looked like me  on t.v., or as the starring character in a book.

Phillise requests this book over and over again. I’m glad that she does. When I first bought the book for her last year, I gave it to her to see what she would say.

She said, “Mommy look. The girl is brown like me.”

From the time that she was real little, I always stressed the fact that she was brown and that she is beautiful. My mother didn’t tell me stuff like this. When I was little, I had a bad self-image. I didn’t even like brown crayons. I thought that brown was one of the ugliest crayons in the box. I rarely ever used it. I never equated that with the dislike of my own brown skin.