Been So Long!

Hi, Dear Readers! It’s been awhile. I promised to write more often. I am doing all I can to conquer anxiety and depression. My number one outlet is writing; followed closely by walking. It’s a park near my house where my husband and I walk for at least an hour on the weekends. My school site is so big that I log at least 3,500-4,300 steps per day. So, I’ve been getting in exercise.

WHAT’S BEEN GOING ON WITH ME?

So, I’ve been battling depression and anxiety so hard. I’ve battled with both of them before. However, I’ve been battling both of them for the past couple months. I have to tell you that they very nearly took me out.

I’m not exaggerating when I say that I honestly did not think that I would make it this time. There were days when I didn’t make it out of my pajamas, didn’t brush my teeth, wash my face, or eat. I just sat in a stupor, staring at the wall, wondering why I was on this earth.

TIRED OF BEING TIRED!

But, I got tired of being tired, so I decided to use writing therapy. That’s one good thing that has come out of this battle. I got another book out of it. When I’ve shared them with friends and family, some have cried and written very heartfelt notes to me because I managed to capture the spirit of depression. When I first wrote some of the poems, they were hard to read because I was still experiencing the situation. Now, that I’m getting a firmer grip on the situation.

THERAPY

I’ve been using various strategies (as mentioned above) to help. My next step is therapy. Although therapy is sometimes seen as a bad thing among Black people, it is not! Basically, my mind is sick, so I’m taking it to the mind doctor to get it ‘looked at’!

FUTURE PLANS

So, I’m currently researching what I need to know so I can start my own publishing company and self-publish my own books.

CURRENT BOOKS

Last year was a busy year for me. I wrote a chapter in two award-winning teacher anthologies. The first one was, “The Whole Truth & Nothing But the Truth, So Help Me Teacher! Part I with Lead Author Vicki Kirk-Mays. The second one was The Mediocre Teacher Project with Lead Author Marquita Smith Blades.

UPCOMING BOOKS

My upcoming book is called The Ebb & Flow of Life: Stages of Walking in My Power. It’s a collection of poetry. The book is divided into three sections/chapters. The first section/chapter is called Bitter, Hurt, Angry, & Afraid. The second section/chapter is called Realizations. The third and final section/chapter is called Walking in My Power.

In the book, I take you through times when I was down and out to the times when I began to realize that I don’t have to stay down forever, to the times when I was beginning to awaken to my potential. During those times, you couldn’t tell me nothing.

It will be released by March 2019 at the latest. After that, I plan to finish the book th at I wrote when I was really battling anxiety & depression.

MOVING FORWARD!

Moving forward, I will not shut down and stop writing on here, because writing is my lifeblood. I cannot go a day without writing or listening to music.

ON THAT NOTE!

On that note, here’s a little music by Anita Baker to carry you out of this post!

Been So Long by Anita Baker

Enjoy! I’ll see you next time!

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HAPPY 2019!

Hello Dear Readers,

Last year was a terrible year for me. I am so happy to leave 2018 behind me. I’m looking forward to releasing my new book, The Ebb & Flow of Life: Stages of Walking in Your Power. I’ll be writing about it on my new blog, Walking in Your Power @ walkinyourpower.wordpress.com

I’m Baaacccckkkk!!!!

Hello Dear Readers,

Did ya’ miss me? I haven’t written on this blog for quite some time. What can I say? I’ve been busy writing another chapter in an anthology and a book of poetry that’s due out next month, called, “The Ebb & Flow of Life: Stages of Walking in My Power”. I’m super excited about it; even more so than the anthology. It’s because the book is all of me. Sink or swim, it’s me- all of me! I poured my heart and soul into this book. I’ll post more as the day approaches. For now, I just want to get back to writing on here on a regular basis!

Get prepared!

Diving Deep into Learning Differences

Dear Readers,

I’ve re-thought my way of thinking about the term “learning disabilities.” I wish I thought this way when I first started teaching. I kinda’ feel bad for all the years that I’ve been telling students that they have disabilities. It’s so funny (not haha! funny, but ironic) that I’ve come to this conclusion because I feel that having students accept that they have a disability led to them becoming a better version of themselves.  It’s nothing I can do about the past though. However, moving forward,  I’m not going to tell my students that they have learning disabilities, I’m going to tell them that they have learning differences.

Every year, in the Resource Lab, I teach the students “how” they’re smart with the Multiple Intelligence Survey. I then give them several surveys and questionnaires. I will post a link late to the worksheets I created.

Trust Circle

Dear Readers,

Early in the school year I was out on sick leave. I thought about my reason for being on  leave- stress! The problem was that I didn’t ask for help. I thought that my students could possibly be experiencing the same thing. That’s when I got the idea to give my students an outlet to express their feelings before they go crazy.

We established some Vegas rules!

They were:

1. What happens/is discussed during trust circle, stays in trust circle.
2. It has to be student led.
3. I can’t do any teaching that day.
4. Everyone has to participate.
5. Only the person with the talking stick can speak.

Here’s a picture of the talking stick I bought. A leader is chosen the week before, while the topic is decided the day of.  I had three “enforcers”  who keep the students quiet and get them to participate. It worked out well because the students were able to let off some steam and have fun at the same time. This is something I’ll be doing from years to come. I’ll keep you updated!

It Happens Every time!

***WARNING- This post is a little long!***

Dear Readers,

Without fail, whenever I am on a high from something wonderful, something happens immediately afterwards to knock me down a peg or two. Just when I think that I have this teaching thing in a bag and I’m not on the fence anymore about wanting to quit, I will have an unusually bad day. This happened a couple of months ago with two students who I’ll call Jean Luc & Chet.

It was a regular Friday morning with my 2nd period, which I classify as my easy class since I only have seven students. Per usual, I broke the class into three groups, with two groups having two students (10th), and one group having three students (9th). I was super excited because I prepared a Shakespeare lesson for the ninth graders who are reading Romeo & Juliet. I was going to have them watch a video on TEDx Talk with MC Lars, a Stanford educated rapper who makes comical edutainment videos while rapping about Shakespearean lyrics, Edgar Allan Poe, and other literary topics.

The first video is entitled “The hip-hop of Shakespeare” (click here for video). The second video (my favorite) is, “Flow Like Poe!”(click here for video). In the video, he explains what iambic pentameter is, a trochee, and a host of other Shakespearean terms. The video is seriously goofy, but contains so much useful information. When I put it on, my students usually half-heartedly groan when I put it on the first time, but after I’ve played it and they “get” Iambic pentameter they usually request it.

I wrote/said that to say that, instead of the usual groaning, I got complaints that were above and beyond; they were actually mean. They were doing extras, as the kids say. I have to explain that one student has to something to say about everything; I mean everything. I don’t like his constant complaining, but I’m used to it. However, on Friday, I was not patient with him.

I had to call in the 9th grade counselor for help for Chet because he would not stop talking as I was talking to him. This particular student has made me call my desire to teach into question because I used to be patient with students like him. I used to want to reach them. Now, I do not have the patience nor a desire to reach this particular student.

I feel really bad because I was trying to be patient with Chet because he’s recently had a personal tragedy, but I am at my wits end. I have tried everything that I know and he’s  taking advantage of my kindness at this point.

As for Jean Luc, I called his parents and gave him Reflection Hour (detention).

I was so exhausted that I went home and went to bed at 7 p.m. I kept trying to get up to do some work, but I was absolutely exhausted.

The next day, I didn’t have a lot of time and patience to handle the situation again today with the same students.

But, through it all, I had to remind myself that it was a bad day and not a bad career.

The Act of Creation…

So many times as I’ve been about to embark on a great journey, it’s been started by a quote. Well, this quote by Pablo Picasso is no different. Here’s the quote: Every act of creation is first an act of destruction.”

This is so apropos because I feel like my life has been torn down and is currently in the process of being restructured and rebuilt. I’m on medical leave from work and don’t know what my next steps are. I thought by this time in my life that I’d know for sure what path I’d like to take. Wrong!

←I feel like this lady right here. I know that something good is on the horizon because my career is in shambles. I’ve been trying to get my resume together but just can’t seem to get it together. I tell ya’, one of these years I’m going to get it together!